Why Forgiveness Sunday?

 Each year as we come to Forgiveness Sunday, many Orthodox Christians ask their pastors, "Why do I need to ask forgiveness from everyone in the Church?  Some of these people I hardly know.  I don't interact regularly with most of them.  How is it possible that I've offended them, or that they've offended me?  What therefore is the point of seeking mutual forgiveness?"

Father Alexander Schmemann once wrote brilliantly on the issue.  Here are his words:

One may ask, "Why should I perform this rite when I have no “enemies”? Why should I ask forgiveness from people who have done nothing to me, and whom I hardly know?" 

To ask these questions is to misunderstand the Orthodox teaching concerning forgiveness. 

It is true, that open enmity, personal hatred, real animosity may be absent from our lives, though if we experience them, it may be easier for us to repent, for these feelings openly contradict Divine commandments. But, the Church reveals to us that there are much subtler ways of offending Divine Love. These are indifference, selfishness, lack of interest in other people, of any real concern for them—in short, that wall which we usually erect around ourselves, thinking that by being “polite” and “friendly” we fulfill God’s commandments. The rite of forgiveness is so important precisely because it makes us realize – be it only for one minute – that our entire relationship to other men is wrong.  It makes us experience that encounter of one child of God with another, of one person created by God with another, makes us feel that mutual “recognition” which is so terribly lacking in our cold and dehumanized world.

You see, if I "hardly know" my brother or sister in Christ, how important have I made them in my life?  What do I display to them as the "value" that I see in them?  And, is such behavior not offensive?

And if I "don't interact" with my brother or sister, is not the same dynamic at play between us?  Have I not, by my ignoring them, shown them that I don't care about them?

Is it not these very same people, who could rightly be offended by my indifference, whose forgiveness I should seek FIRST?  Are they not MOST worthy of my most sincere repentance, seeking sincerely their forgiveness?

Some will say, "It's a two-way street, Father.  Why must I be the one to be caring?  They could come to me as easily as I could go to them!"

But you see, you just indicted yourself.  You admit - it's EASY to be a loving brother or sister in Christ.  Any relationship must begin somewhere.  None of us can be exonerated from a responsibility to care for the needs of others.  Our Lord just taught us that lesson in last week's Gospel!  "As you have done it to the least of My brethren, you have done it to Me." (Mat 25:40)

And so we come together, and in full sincerity, and with open hearts, we ask in all humility for EVERY other person to forgive us.  We dare not ignore our Lord's words on THIS day:  “If you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses…” (Matt. 6:14-15).  

I won't judge you.  But I NEED this forgiveness!  So to all of you, forgive me!  God forgives all!!!